Child Sleep: A Guide for Parents
Sleep is important for every child, but for many adopted children, bedtime can feel overwhelming. Early experiences, changes in routine, anxiety, or feeling unsafe at night can all affect how easily a child settles and stays asleep.
This guide brings together simple, practical ideas to help you support your child and make bedtime feel calmer for everyone.
Why sleep matters
Sleep helps children to:
- grow
- stay healthy
- build memory
- regulate emotions
- learn new things
- cope well with daily life.
Many children experience sleep difficulties, so you’re not alone if bedtime has become a challenge.
Why adopted children may struggle with sleep
Children who have had difficult or unsettled early experiences may find bedtime especially hard. This might be because:
- their body or mind stays "on alert"
- they feel anxious or scared at night
- they’re unsure if adults will come when they need them
- they struggle with changes
- they’ve had inconsistent routines in the past.
In the early days
When your child first joins your family, it’s completely normal for sleep to be disrupted. Learn about their previous routines, keep some things familiar, and use scent-based comforts like a pillowcase with your scent.
Create a calming bedtime rhythm
A predictable routine each night helps children know what to expect. Try keeping bedtime consistent, creating a 30 to 45 minute calming wind-down, maintaining a cool and quiet bedroom, avoiding screens and busy play, and using low light in the evening.
Calming activities to try
Use their senses to calm down, try:
- a soft blanket or toys
- a warm baths
- gentle music
- white noise
- lavender scents
- night lights
- a small snack before bed.
Create a sleep pack or calming box
Let your child help create and decorate it. Include items such as:
- soft materials
- worry dolls
- scents
- night lights
- photos
- relaxing audio.
When bedtime feels scary
Talk gently about worries, reassure safety, use relaxation exercises, and offer comforting objects.
Separation anxiety at night
Leave an item with your scent, record a voice note, reassure you’ll be there in the morning, and try gradual retreat - starting close and slowly moving further away.
Night waking and nightmares
Go to your child in their room, keep interactions calm and brief and ensure their calming objects are available. Normalise nightmares and comfort them.
Keep a sleep diary
Record bedtime, wake times, naps, settling times, night wakings, and total sleep. This helps spot patterns and can support conversations with professionals.
For more information on topics like, bedtime routines, bedroom environment, relaxation tips, diet and sleep, night terrors and nightmares and much more visit The Sleep Charity website.
For information on topics such has bedwetting and soiling, visit Enuresis Resource and Information Centre (ERIC). ERIC, The Children’s Bowel & Bladder Charity is the only charity dedicated to the bowel and bladder health of all children and teenagers in the UK. ERIC provides expert support, information and understanding to children and teenagers and enables parents, carers and professionals to help them establish good bowel and bladder health.
If things don’t improve
Remember to be kind to yourself. Supporting a child with sleep difficulties can be exhausting, and it’s okay if progress feels slow. Many families experience the same challenges - you’re not alone.
Sometimes the most helpful step is simply talking things through with another parent, a trusted friend, or a professional. Reaching out for support isn’t a sign of struggle - it’s a sign of care, for both you and your child.